Supporting Kids with Back-to-School Anxiety
The start of a new school year is exciting, but for many children it can also bring up feelings of worry and stress. Whether it’s moving to a new school, adjusting to a different classroom, or simply returning after summer break, transitions often stir up anxious thoughts and physical symptoms. For some kids, this might show up as stomachaches, headaches, irritability, or difficulty sleeping. For others, it might sound like “What if I don’t know anyone?” or “What if my teacher doesn’t like me?”
How to Recognize Anxiety in Your Child
The most effective way to know what your child is feeling is to ask. Starting the conversation sends the message that you are open to listening, and it may help your child share worries they didn’t know how to bring up. Even if they say, “I’m not nervous,” you’ve shown that their feelings matter, and that door will be easier to walk through next time.
Along with listening, pay attention to behavior and body signals. Anxiety in kids often shows up physically—stomachaches, headaches, or complaints of feeling unwell. Sometimes kids may be more irritable, restless, or avoidant about talking about school.
How to Support Your Child
Conversations are a great start, but children also need tools to calm their body and mind when anxious thoughts feel overwhelming. These worries are real to them, even if from an adult perspective they seem small. Instead of saying “You’ll be fine” or “It’s not a big deal,” try offering support and strategies that build confidence.
Practical, evidence-based tools include:
Box Breathing: Inhale for 4 counts, exhale for 4 counts, repeat 4 times while imagining drawing a square. This slows the body’s stress response and clears space for calmer thinking.
Color Hunt: Choose a color and find five things nearby that match. This simple grounding exercise shifts focus away from worry.
Comfort Items: A small, non-distracting object in a backpack (like a smooth stone, favorite keychain, or a note from you) can provide reassurance.
Routine Practice: Walk through the school building, rehearse the morning routine, or role-play social situations to make the unknown more familiar.
Talking It Out: Regular, calm conversations about their feelings—without rushing to fix or dismiss them—help children feel heard and supported.
The key is to practice these strategies when your child is calm, not in the middle of heightened anxiety. This helps their brain and body “store” the skill, making it easier to use when it’s really needed.
Building Long-Term Confidence
Over time, learning and practicing coping skills not only helps with back-to-school worries but also builds lifelong resilience. When children experience success in managing their anxious thoughts—even in small ways—they gain a sense of control and self-trust that supports them in school and beyond.
As parents, our role is not to eliminate all anxiety but to equip our children with the tools, routines, and reassurance they need to face challenges with confidence.
Additional Resources:
· Practical parent guidance on noticing signs and coaching coping skills (AAP/Healthy Children).
· How to listen, validate, and “practice” school routines/exposures (Child Mind Institute.)
· Government overviews on child anxiety signs, prevalence, and when to seek help (NIMH).
